This poem was inspired by an open mic poetry reading when I lived in Seattle.  I was doing a reading at a coffee shop.  It was a relatively mild poem in my opinion, but afterwards the organizer came up to me and said she appreciated the effort but next time I read, could I please not read poems that had bad words in them, since some members of the audience were sensitive to that.  I was really offended by this notion so I decided to write a poem that would offend as many people as possible and yet not have any bad words.  It accomplished the goal too well, as after I read the poem once the cafe stopped holding open mic poetry readings.